In this second episode of our Back to School series, I’m diving into a topic that’s incredibly important for us as school counselors—how to make sure the vital work we do doesn’t go unnoticed.
Too often, despite the significant impact we have, our efforts can go unseen by those around us.
In this episode, I emphasize the importance of:
- Advocating for Our Role: Ensuring that the value of our work is communicated so it doesn’t get overlooked.
- Sharing Successes: Highlighting the progress of our students with colleagues and administrators to build awareness and appreciation for the counseling role.
- Collaboration is Key: Being seen as integral members of the school team by actively participating in and contributing to the broader educational environment.
- Impactful Interventions: Recognizing the power of empathy and understanding in counseling.
- Building a Supportive Environment: Advocating for ourselves to help create a school culture where our contributions are respected and supported.
Join me as we explore how to ensure our work is visible, valued, and celebrated as we head into what I hope will be our best school year yet!
Transcript
Carol: You're listening to the counselor chat podcast, a show for school counselors looking for easy to implement strategies, how to tips, collaboration, and a little spark of joy. I'm Carol Miller, your host. I'm a full time school counselor and the face behind counseling essentials. I'm all about creating simplified systems, data driven practices, and using creative approaches to engage students. If you're looking for a little inspiration to help you make a big impact on student growth and success, you're in the right place because we're better together. Ready to chat? Let's dive in.
Carol: Hi, everyone, it's Carol. Welcome back to another episode of Counselor Chat. And welcome back to our second episode of our Back to School series for school counselors. And this back to school series, if you haven't listened to us last week, is really about empowering counselors to really have their best year ever. I really want everyone to go into the school year feeling empowered, feeling passionate, feeling like no matter what, they've got this and they can have the right mindset and the right attitude to really have a very successful year. So today we are going to really talk about the work that we do and really sharing that work that we do and how that is so important to let other people really know what exactly we do. In 2007, violinist by the name of Joshua Bell thought he would try a social experiment. So he dressed up in just plain street clothes and went to a really busy Washington, DC train station. Now, Joshua Bell makes hundreds of thousands of dollars for his performances and he is highly sought after. He has played professionally at some of the biggest events. His classical performances are outstanding and he is hailed as one of the greatest violinists ever. He also plays a multimillion dollar stradivarius, and he is just really well known in the world of classical music and violinists. With that being said, Joshua decided that he was going to try the social experiment. And so in 2007, he went into a really busy DC train station and he started playing. He played some of the music that he actually played the night before to a sold out house where received, you know, his standing ovations. And as he played, nobody was stopping to, to listen to him. People were just so busy doing their own things. They acted like they didn't even see him. Everyone just walked back and forth past him. Nobody was stopping to listen to him. Joshua was playing basically to himself for what seemed like hours. You might be wondering why I'm sharing this story with you of Joshua Bella, but I want you to think how we are all a little bit like Joshua where sometimes we are this highly trained, decorated, masterful professional of our school counseling powers, and yet people don't stop to recognize the importance that we have or the great work that we're doing. They are just really like the commuters, so busy doing their own hustle and bustle, doing their own thing, worrying about their own problems, worrying about what they have to do next, that they. They're not stopping, they're not noticing, they're not aware of what else is going on around them and who might be in their presence. So it's so important that we share with others the work that we do. We have to get them when they're not moving around the busy train station, but they're not so focused on what they have to do next that they can actually stop and see us and feel like they're in the performance, they're in the audience, taking in our greatness. We have to change things a little bit. We have to really let people know what we do, because it's only then that we feel like there's a sense of pride and accomplishment and even a sense of teamwork with the people that we're working with. I want to share a little story with you that something that really was a game changer for me. It was actually pretty early on in my career, when I first started in school counseling, I was really between different buildings. Every day seemed like I was somewhere different. In fact, every day I was somewhere different at a different elementary school. And my job was really to provide trauma counseling to students. I would go to a building, meet with a group of students or an individual student and do my sessions. And then the next day, I would go to another building and then rotated. Every week. One of the little people that I had the pleasure of working with was a little boy named Douglas. And Douglas was the sweetest little second grader that you'd probably ever want to meet. But Douglas had the most traumatic story of any individual that I've ever worked with. This was a little boy who, when you looked at him, did not look like he was in second grade. I mean, he barely looked like he was a kindergartner. He was tiny. He was little. He was super skinny. And whoo, he had a lot of energy. But Douglas had a really traumatic life. He was a little boy that was basically, grew up in a crib, and his mother was an addict, a really heavy addict. And in one of her moments where she was hallucinating and really on some pretty heavy drugs, she had slit his throat from basically, ear to ear. And had left him in the crib, basically to die. Amazingly, he was bleeding so much that it actually caked and became kind of like a scab, and that actually saved him. But he was found about three days later in the crib with his throat slashed and everything, of course, completely covered with blood, and he was barely breathing at that point in time. Luckily, this little guy survived, but he was left with a huge scar from one side of his throat to the other. And it was my job to meet with Douglas and to try my very best to have him feel good, to have him feel like he was a part of the school community, to feel like he could feel safe. I met with Douglas every week. It was just the two of us. And I really didn't have an office. I had a closet. And when I say I had a closet, it was a book closet, as a matter of fact. And when you walked in, every wall was lined with books, only about maybe 4ft wide and about 6ft long. And the custodians had off, well, had made a table in the room for me by sawing a regular table lengthwise in half and attaching it to a shelf so that I had this makeshift table. And when you had chairs in front of the table, you couldn't walk around anybody. You had actually have everybody get up so that you could walk around to the backside of the table or the back side of the room if you needed extra people to sit down. It was tiny, and I say this because the room was hot, there was obviously no windows in it. And if you had the door ajar in any way, shape or form, even if it, you know, you had a little opening, it was stifling in there. It's now. I had met with Douglas almost all year long. It was towards the end of our school year. There was probably only about a month left of school, and we're in this room, and it is a super hot day, and Douglas only wore turtlenecks. And when I say he only wore turtlenecks, he only wore turtlenecks with the collar pulled all the way up, basically to his nose. So imagine this turtleneck collar all pulled up right underneath his nose. And if it slid down at all, he would grab his hands on each side of the turtleneck top and pull it up so that it would reach the very bottom of his nose. And on this sweltering hot day, I said to Douglas, Douglas, aren't you hot? And of course, he looks at me and he shakes his little head, yeah. And I said, douglas, like you want to wear a t shirt. And the look that he gave me was just, like, darts coming out of his eyes, like, piercing me. And they were saying, basically, lady, are you kidding? You know I only wear turtlenecks. How could you even ask me such a thing? And so, after a few more minutes of talking with Douglas, I said, douglas, is it because of your scar? You don't want to put on a t shirt? And he, of course, nods his head. Yep. And a few more minutes go by, and I ask him, Douglas, I've never seen your scar. Would you. Would you actually show it to me? He has his little hands on his turtleneck, and he's looking at me, and he's kind of giving me the up and down look with his eyes, like, checking me out, like, what do I do here? Finally, he nods his head. Yeah. And the next thing I know is he slowly slides down his turtleneck so that I could see this huge. And when I say huge, it is a huge, probably one inch thick scar that really goes from almost one ear under his neck to the other ear. And when you see something that is so shocking, you want to have your mouth drop wide open and stare in disbelief. I wanted to do that, but I also knew I couldn't do that. So I'm looking at Douglas not to show any emotions on my face of shock or panic. And he's looking at me with his eyes wide open, just waiting for me to say something. And I couldn't. I didn't know what to say. And I sat there, and I looked, and he was looking at me, and I was looking at him, and he's looking at me, just waiting. And finally I say, you know what, Douglas? It kind of looks like a second smile. And maybe it is. Maybe it's your lucky smile, because we're certainly lucky to have you here with us today. And he seemed kind of okay with that answer. And he kind of nodded, and he almost smiled, which for Douglas. Douglas, that was a lot. And Douglas, I said, hey, do you want to put on a t shirt now? And of course, nope. No, he did not. And the little turtleneck goes right up to his nose, and the rest of the time goes bye. We're, like, sweating in the room, but time is up. And I bring Douglas back to class. The next day, I get a call from Mister Fogarty, who's the principal of the school. He's like, listen, I need you to come to school right now. And all I could think of is, oh, no. Like, what happened? What is going on? What did I do? I must have terrorized this kid. Oh, my gosh, this is awful. Because Mister Fogarty did not sound very happy. So he's like, get here right now. So I'm like, okay, okay, let me just change some things around. And I did that, and I moved some things around in my schedule, and I went back to the school, and there's Mister Fogarty standing outside the building, just waiting for me. And I get out of my car, park it, go up to the building. Mister Fogarty's there. I'm like, hi, I'm here. He's like, come with me. And I'm thinking, oh, no. And as we are walking into the school, he said, I got a call last night from Douglas's foster mom, who wants to know who was that counselor who talked to her kiddo. And now her kiddo was demanding that he. That she take him to Walmart so that they could buy t shirts, because he needed a t shirt for show and tell day, because it was his turn for show and tell, and he wanted to show everyone his lucky smile. So imagine my shock. So we go to Douglas's classroom, and there's Douglas sitting in a seat, the one closest to the teacher's desk, and there's Douglas in his t shirt. And I pop my head in the room, and he sees me, and he waves, and he comes up to me. He's like, I had to show everybody my lucky smile. And it was a really great feeling seeing the impact that my words made on Douglas. But here's the thing. That was a moment of joy. But here's the thing. That was a moment of joy. That was a moment of, wow, I did something right. That was a moment of victory. But if Douglas mom, Foster mom, hadn't called our principal, he wouldn't have known. The teacher wouldn't have known, because I never shared that with them. And thankfully, those words were shared because Douglas had so many victories that year, from being able to really hold his pencil on his own, to being able to run and kick a kickball at recess, to not dumping all his stuff out of his desk and clearing the room because he was upset by something and was experiencing some trauma. The fact that he actually found some safe spaces within the classroom and with his teacher, Mister Fogarty, and with me, those were all victories. And you know what? We had to come together to share those, much like Joshua Bell in the DC train station. We have to find a way to let the people that are around us know who we are, the work that we're doing, and we have to be able to share our victories. We have to be able to let them know what we're doing and how we're doing it. And the accomplishments that we've made and our kiddos have made, really nothing us but our kiddos have made. And we'll find that we didn't make those in a bubble. We made those because of the help of everybody else doing the things that they're doing. So, my friends, as we are all so busy doing our own things and in that train station, running around trying to get our own things done and unaware of everything else that's going on, we have to really stop and remember to notice what else is happening. And this is not only about working with the teachers, but working with everyone. It's really important as we start this school year to remember really the importance of advocating for ourselves as a school counselor. We have to share our successes. We have to communicate our needs, and we have to really make sure that our colleagues understand the valuable role that we play in the lives of our students. We have to remember that we're not alone. We're not solo. And even if we have a co counselor, we're not just the counselors in the counseling department, but we are a team. We're a team member for all the people that are in the building. And it's together that we can make a difference and we can ensure that all of our students really receive the support that they need to thrive. So that's my little nugget of gold of sharing those glimmers with you today. So, my friends, until next week, I hope you remember to share with others about what you do, the things that you're doing, and that you find those victories that you're going to share together. Next week, I'll have another little tidbit for you of how we can really have the most awesome year yet. But until next time, have a great week. Bye for now.
Carol: Thanks for listening to today's episode of Counselor Chat. All of the links I talked about can be found in the show notes and@counselingessentials.org podcast. Be sure to hit, follow or subscribe on your favorite podcast player. And if you would be so kind to leave a review, I'd really appreciate it. Want to connect? Send me a DM on Facebook or Instagram at counseling essentials until next time. Can't wait till we chat. Bye for now.
